Adulting is the worst. That’s a generally agreed upon statement by most people between the age of 25-35. Just check out my favorite website, Buzzfeed’s, articles on the topics, and these are just two from the past month.
Moving away from your high school and college friends is hard. Especially when you have such phenomenal friends like I do. My girls are amazing people and we are always there for everything for each other. Unfortunately, that’s what everyone I meet has to live up to when trying to make friends.
There are piles and piles of articles on how to make friends as adults (seriously, just google it), but I have yet to see it actually work. I’m lucky enough to have a built in best friend, so we when moved, I knew I wouldn’t be alone. However, as much as I love my husband, I still need girlfriends. And here starts the struggle. How in the world do you make friends?!
Here are the commonly suggestion ways to make friends and why they don’t work:
-Meet friends at work! I pretty much work with a small, but great group of people who are very different from me. That’s really helpful to our work more successful, but not great for lasting, deep friendships.
-Make friends with your kids’ parents! That should be an obvious no for me.
-Meet friends online! Maybe I’m too paranoid, but the thought of meeting strangers online scares me. You have no idea who you are talking to or connecting with. I’m also in a big city. This isn’t North Dakota where I trusted everyone, and despite the fact that I am very trusting, Phoenix isn’t the same.
I did try one new way to make friends. I helped “host” a watch party for the UND-NDSU fooball game hoping to meet other young UND alumni. It didn’t quite work out how I planned, but at least I actually did something!!
So here is what I’m doing instead of making friends.
Blogging- it lets me talk about how I don’t have any friends, and gives me something to do when my husband is at work
Crafting- I love to make things, spend time on Pinterest finding projects, and then blogging about it
Hiking- I thought this would be a good way to make friends because people told me that everyone out here hikes and that we could meet people out on the trails…or we could just take some sweet selfies
Stalking ways to make friends- I’ve been looking at Meet-Ups, Facebook, really anything to try to find other people, but basically failing to take any sort of action
It’s a major balancing act, one that sometimes tests my mental health, but I’m working on it constantly. We are always looking for things to do and trying to do new things to keep on the prowl for friends. However, as I typed that, I feel super creepy…being on the prowl for friends. Just talking myself out of doing new things.
I think I’ll just watch Netflix and hang out (not chill, because that doesn’t mean what I thought it did).